Don't Know Anymore

I awoke today visualizing your hands,
escaped the well just in time
to get up out of bed.

And I cannot breathe,
the music attempts to serenade the tears
but I continue to bleed evermore.

I cannot speak to anyone,
every other person tries to console
but it is not you who thumbs the drops.

I cannot conduct conversations,
others leap in to save a soul
but no words cure this longing.

I cannot stray from those songs,
Upbeat is sporatic
but I crossover immediately after.

I cannot race up those stairs,
5 o'clock teases my thrill to be home
but I will never open the door again to see you.

I cannot rest on those pillows,
the lavender scent is straining to satisfy
but it is your scent I crave.

I cannot smile for tomorrow,
the sun carefully crafts a surprise
but my dreams of you never come true.

I cannot defeat this depression,
my therapist instructs to step away
but when I step away I fear you will be gone.